Standards are a changin'

WELL IT'S started. The new european standards are up and running and testing is already being carried out by at least one LightBlue Testing House and the DVH are trembling in their jackboots.

It's true folks, those quaint old folk down at the EEC-CEE-emc² have decide to apply their light touch to paraglider certification and it's going really well. Oh yes, really well.

"The new certification standard EU15-123.5623.78/PG/i/12.99 Rel 1.90 (part II) has been printed and is flying off the shelves", said Valerie duShag Villeneuve, PR rep with We Love Trees Inc, the sub-contractor for all EU standards worth less than 1000 euros/year and needing more than 10000 sheets of paper per volume.

"Everyones talking about it", she continued, "Just go to any hill and ask the pilots. You don't even have to be a pilot you know. I'm not."

So we did. We went to Annecy, Piedrahita, the Long Mynd, Torrey Pines and that little takeoff alongside Brighton which only works in a sea breaze, you know the one.

We had a lot of replies, and here's a representative sample;

"What? Eh? Get back! The prop on these things will kill you!"

"What? EC-what? I have no idea what the fuck you're talking about. Now piss off."

"What? No idea. Mine's a DHV-2."

Amazingly the DVH were available for comment. "Well, we knew it would happen eventually", said Klaus TestMier, "It just upsets us that it's those miserable un-regulated French bastards that are behind it all. Over."

"They're nicking all our good ideas, you know, it's downright theft", he went on, "and what's more, they get all the fun down there, they've got the Alps and everything. It's just not right that they get to set the standards for everyone too. It's always been the Germans that set rules, everyone knows it. It's because we're good at it. Over."

"Roger that", we say.

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 2001 "Bognor Regis Birdman" videos