Subliminal Messages

IT RATHER seems like there might be a little inter-team communications going on in the currently running Bred Bull X-Pulp competition.

Perhaps the organisers should be informed...

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1494 "Leonardo da Vinci Training Hill" videos

Ghostly Visions

WE'VE JUST received a photo purporting to be from a well known West Coast flying site in the US of A. It was hand delivered to the Pie editor and we have to agree it seems strange.

At first glance it looks to be a simple photo of a grassy field, but on further examination it does seem to contain a ghostly shape. Strange!

In the general interests of the free flying community we would ask all pilots to examine the image closely and see if you spot anything out of the ordinary. Anything vaguely ghost-like, maybe.

If you do, we would ask you to mail us and let us know what you think it might be.

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1494 "Leonardo da Vinci Training Hill" videos

The Machine

PIE IN THE SKY - rarely speechless!

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1494 "Leonardo da Vinci Training Hill" videos

Tracivitis

HERE AT Pie we like to keep an eye on the general health of paraglider pilots and have recently been informed of a worrying trend.

Recently, the number of reported cases of what doctors call tracivitis, a recently discovered obsessive-compulsive disorder, have increased significantly such that we feel we should bring this to the attention of the general flying population.

Luckily, the symptoms are pretty easy to recognise so please take a long look in the mirror and see if you are suffering from any of the following; redness around the eyes, aching right wrist, difficulty sleeping, swollen right index finger, inability to use a laptop without the Googleearth plugin or a complete failure to recognise what your wife looks like any more.

If you find yourself suffering from any of these symptoms please try and confront the issue immediately before it takes over your life.

The General Medical Councils of most countries are offering the following advice; uninstall the Googlearth plugin from all your computer systems, throw your mouse away, remove all IGC & KLM files from your house, go outside for 5 minutes every hour during daylight hours, stop monitoring that PGF thread every five minutes, get a life or a girlfriend and, most importantly, go to the pub and drink a beer without your laptop or smartphone.

If all else fails and you find yourself unable to escape the evil clutches of this addiction, there are help groups and charitable organisations that can assist you with your fight, just Google tracivitis or Trackers Anonymous. Good luck!

We can only hope that this message and the advice from the worlds top medical experts will reach those in need before it's too late.

Pie in the Sky: helping addicts, one step at a time.

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1494 "Leonardo da Vinci Training Hill" videos

Also For Sale

For Sale:

Blozone Tantrum Are-11.
As new. Still crisp. Yellow/Red. Flown 5 times.
Always packed with care. Never taken a collapse (obviously).

Asking: 20 Euros
Will consider swap for Edell Space 27 or Hairwave Kiss M

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1494 "Leonardo da Vinci Training Hill" videos

For Sale

For Sale: 

Blozone Tantrum Are-11. As new. Still crinkly. Orange/Red.
Flown 4 times: 100km on practice day, 2 hour evening post-retrieve float to the pub, task 1 & 2.

Asking: 25 Euros, negotiable.
Will consider swap for bus ticket to Madrid on Thursday.


Wankers!
[they definitely get it now - Ed]

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1494 "Leonardo da Vinci Training Hill" videos

CAT 1 Organiser Pack

THE NEW Pie in the Sky CAT-1 Competition Organiser Pack is now available for the introductory price of 199 EUR plus delivery. That's right, for less than 200 euro bucks you can relieve much of the pressure and risk involved in running a high level paragliding competition.

For many years  we've watched comp organisers struggle to put together a full blown competition, often re-inventing the wheel as they go and being bogged down with the administration and as the comp gets into full swing, spending much of their precious time putting out fires rather than focusing their attention on running the comp.

Well no longer folks. Thanks to our CAT-1 Comp Pack much of the worry and hard work will fade away and you, the organiser, can focus your time more appropriately. That's right, you'll be able to personally ensure the sandwich fillings are tasty, have the time to check the retrieve van tyre pressures are tip-top and maybe even have time to check the latest scores. All those other day to day, thankless tasks that you are required to do will receive so much more of your valuable time.

So how did we do it?

After considerable research into the requirements of running a modern high level competition our expert working group have put together a complete pack of legally approved, cross-border, FIA approved documentation for the would-be organiser. Yes, that's you, the one at the back with his fingers crossed.

Full documentation is available on our sales packaging, but here's a taster of what's inside the box:

• an iron-clad, 3rd set of lines exclusion clause that may be added to any existing documentation
• a get out of jail free card
• a legal waiver allowing you to keep your house should a federation or governing body suddenly realise they've been asleep on the job part-way through your comp and stop it.
• a 50-tablet blister packet of Paracetamol (600mg)
• the Blozone secret hotline help number, previously only known to 6 people worldwide
• a web page template explaining to your competitors they may soon have some spare free-flying time on their hands
• the home addresses of all SIVL working group members and a Google maps route showing the shortest route to visit them all in a single weekend
• a legal document explaining to the local authorities that the effort they put in alongside your own has actually been wasted and 50% of the expected local revenue will now not appear. Available in 10 languages.
• a 10 EUR voucher for hand cream
• a hand written bribery note which may be used appropriately to help ensure you get gold-star approval for any future comps should your current one be fucked over
• a 20-tablet packet of Diazepam/Valium direct from an online drugs company in India that may be used yourself if appropriate candidates do not naturally present themselves during the first few days
• two matchsticks, to support the eyelids or the corners of the mouth when a smile is required
• a 20% discount voucher for the Blozone 2-liner of your choice
• 
  
• ... and much more ...

So there it is folks. Get it while it's hot. Only while stocks last!

Wankers!
[I think they get it now - Ed]

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1972 "Robert Livingston Seagull patio door" accident

Dear Kitt II

Dear Kitt,

Mark Hayman for President !

yours sincerely,
Editor, Pie in the Sky

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1972 "Robert Livingston Seagull patio door" accident

Piedrahita 2011

TO CELEBRATE the blinding success of yet another World Championships, Pie in the Sky have decided to pay for a day of fun and frivolity for the organisers and all competitors.

Woo-hoo!

The location of the celebrations have yet to be finalised, but the theme has already been decided. A day-trip to a Brewery was voted the most entertaining option and we'll even throw in free transport so everyone can partake of a few beers.

We have left the organisation in the capable hands of SIVL (and their working group) and eagerly await their deliberations so we can all have a fun-filled day out.


Wankers!

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1972 "Robert Livingston Seagull patio door" accident