WE RECEIVED an anonymous newspaper clipping in the post this month from a UK newspaper regarding a PG accident. The report blatently described paragliding as, quote:
"... a group of relaxed pilots flying aerofoils that are capable of foot-launching from gently sloping hilltops and flying considerable distances using only thermic activity".
Yes, we know what you're thinking, but wait there's more. It went on:
Yes, we know what you're thinking, but wait there's more. It went on:
"... entering severe turbulence his wing was pushed behind him in what is known as a full stall. While trying to recover the situation the wing entered a cascade of events none of which the pilot could recover from. As a last resort he threw his reserve parachute which only partly opened..."
Stop the presses. What the hell is going on here? None of the Pie journalists had ever seen anything like this before, at least not in the last 35 years of paragliding. To say we were shocked at this level of irrisponsible journalism was to put it mildly.
Your intrepid reporters at Pie got on the case immediately, we needed to put things right. We wrote letters of complaint, we filled up their inbox's, we called their hotline. We even threatened to send round (the original) Rod B. We wanted to make sure this never happened again.
Luckily, the hacks down at the East Wendsleydale Evening Echo printed a retraction the very next day where they re-worded the whole story.
"Apologies for yesterdays screw-up", it read, "A para-hang-wing-jumper suffered an accident over near the old quarry yesterday. The victims friend and fellow para-rider Pete Peterson said it was clear he had been hit by a freak gust of wind known as the thermal-tidal-wave-effect causing his para-hang-craft to implode and both para-hang-wing-chute and rider to fall like a stone. For those who don't know paragliding, it's a high risk sport involving adrenalin junkies jumping off cliffs after being towed into the sky behind speedboats. The victim, John Johnson, a member of the "XXX Paradrena-Deathwings Club", is now well on his way to recovery in the Princess Diana ward of the local hospital, etc, etc"
Job done.
Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1982 "Airplane II" sliding door scene
Funnier than the 1982 "Airplane II" sliding door scene