Towering Twat

EPITOMISING THE modest nature for which paraglider pilots are famous, a twat jumped off a tower a couple of weeks ago. Nothing unusual in that, we hear you say, what with the debt crisis, mortgages failing hourly and the stock markets crashing more regularly than a blind skier, there's been a fair few "tower jumps" recently.

Sadly for our sport, however, this one seems to have been strapped to a speedwing.

Dull Chants, paraglider dealer and all-round shy person, seemed to have got away with it though, as his plan to speedfly from the top of an ancient US monument seemed to go without a hitch. For any non-US readers, please note that in the US an ancient, protected, historical monument will be about the same age as your house. Or younger.

On the day in question, it seems the police were nowhere to be seen and he had the opportunity to pull off his stunt. He pulled off a pretty clean exit, followed by what can only be described as a very short top-to-bottom into a flat field and ran off into the sunset. Or as it's better known, the back seat of your mates truck. Well done Dull. Here at Pie we particularly enjoyed the emotional high-fives in the car park. Wa-hooo, go team gonads and where's my double decaf latte?

Unfortunately for Mssr. Chants, and for the public image of our sport, it rather seems that the egocentric side of his nature took over as he then published the video on youToob. Soon thereafter, the overworked and undermanned local police spotted the video, presumably while checking youToob for criminals stupid enough to publish their crimes on the web, and asked the media to circulate it. It wasn't long before Dull was picked up and arrested while laying low in his carefully selected hideout. Paramotoring on an Oregon beach. D'Oh!

So there you have it folks. Do we even need to even say it?

How many branches in the dumb-ass tree did you hit when you fell out Dull? 10,000?

Pie in the Sky
Funnier than the 1972 "Robert Livingston Seagull patio door" accident